‘Why I’m A S__t Magnet’ | Anon

We spotted this earlier on today in one of our Facebook Groups and thought that it was too good not to share:

‘Im frequently asked why I am a s__t magnet and why colleagues are warned on their first shift with me.

‘My last set of shifts-

‘Announced to a female sergeant in front of 3 other sergeants and approx 30 bobbies (shift change over) that I forgot how she took it, I meant her brew as Id put sugar in it by accident

‘Left the nick and within 8 minutes of the start of my shift id had to use my parva, and ended up in a fight. Only issue is splashback got myself because of how close the situation started

‘Mental health patient starts to kick off in A&E.

‘I already had crushed finger due to this one and colleague had her hand crushed (no break fortunately), whilst stopping him trying to hurt himself I got elbowed by a different colleague in the face

‘And last shift, male arrested in a car. Not even my arrest or transport, arrived back at the nick soon as he saw me he kicked off and wanted a fight.

‘All these were on separate shifts

‘I was happily informed by my unit, that it was a slow week for people working with me.

‘Back in Thursday for more fun’

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